Cold Weather Haiku

The cold has me trapped.Wicked Dahhhk

Like a lobster in a trap.

Now I want lobster.

Open the front door.

Met head on by burning wind.

Fuck that, shut the door.

The polar vortex

has returned to kill us all.

I wish it wouldn’t.

The cats want outside.

I open the door for them.

Fuck that, shut the door.

The snow is falling.

Everywhere I look is white.

Like Primetime TV.

I forgot my food.

I left it in my car’s trunk.

Nature’s freezer burn.

FWPThe heat keeps me warm.

But the air dries out my throat.

(First World Problems Pic.)

I should check for mail.

I poke my head out to see.

Fuck that, shut the door.

This is my blanket.

There are many like it but

this one is mine.  (Close.)

Drinking hot chocolate

mixed together with coffee

makes me hot wired.

Hey stupid Jet Stream.

How’s about you go back North

and take the cold too.

I’d like to go run.

Again, I’d LIKE to go run.

Fuck that, shut the door.

You know it’s cold outNot a heating element.

when you have to use the fridge

to warm the kitchen.

Dear Winter weather,

You can go ahead and stop.

Signed, everyone cold.

Mittens over gloves.

Hoods pulled over toques and scarves.

We’re over this crap.

Cold Weather Haiku

Do you want to read some more?

Fuck it, shut the door.

And keep it shut.

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