- It’s hard to tell when a nap is over, either when your cat starts licking your hand or starts biting your toes.
- Eating a salami sandwich over a pure white duvet isn’t tempting fate, it’s keeping Tide-to-Go pens in business.
- My most undesired five word phrase when looking in the mirror: What the hell is that?
- Sometimes making plans is a simple phone call. Sometimes it’s like deactivating an atom bomb.
- Whenever I move someone’s car or change spots in a parking lot, I get the Tetris theme in my head.
- This timelapse video of Hurricane Sandy is long, but still ridiculous: