Today I Learned – October 31/12 (All-Halloween Edition)

  • Make sure all candy is checked thoroughly before you hand it out. Buying “test” boxes and bags is sufficient for testing purposes.

  • The number of children coming for candy will be proportionately opposite to what you have in the house.  If you have lots, you’ll have too much.  If you have a little, it’ll be gone before you get to have any.  So just get lots.
  • Good things to hand out: anything that is at least 50% sugar or has a wrapper containing at least two exclamation points.  Bad things to hand out: raisins, toothbrushes or nuts.  Seriously, nuts?  Come on people.
  • You can go right up to the 31st before you realize you haven’t carved a pumpkin yet.
  • Carving tomatoes is not nearly the same.
  • Add to the list of horrible things to pass out:  brown molasses candies.  Gross.
  • Pillowcases > Plastic Bags.
  • Full Chocolate Bars > Mini Chocolate Bars. (Literally and figuratively.)
  • Rockets are to be eaten by the sleeve or separated into colours for mass consumption.  Every other way is wrong.
  • 4pm is too early to be trick or treating.  4am is too late. (Or way too early.)
  • There’s the Great Pumpkin, but Charlie can have that, I’d rather go with this:

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