Today I Learned – February 5/12 – Super Bowl Edition

    • Being the only “undefeated against non-cheaters” team in the euchre tournament doesn’t bring your money back.

  • The only thing better than 6 hours of pre-game is 8 hours of pre-game festivities.
  • The moment you realize you’re not going to get the American commercials puts a damp sad darkness on the remainder of the game.
  • You can consume cheese in four different ways without eating “actual” cheese. (Nacho Doritos, Mozza Sticks, Cheesies, Cheesecake.)
  • It’s amazing how a room that contained 14 swearing drinking screaming card playing men can become a room of toddlers and parents playing with dolls and reading books a short while later.  The mess is about equal.
  • Starting a fire in the fire pit in the middle of the afternoon after standing outside for most of the morning in the cold is the most mocking fire you will ever stand in front of.
  • Random people walking past an outdoor party may utter partial racial slurs towards injured tight ends.
  • Placing a plate of recently created food in front of part of the group does not put the onus on that group to tell the rest of the people about said food.
  • Have I mentioned how shitty the Canadian commercials are compared to the American ones?
  • Watching a safety become the first score of the game is highly entertaining.  Especially when it was an option in the pool that nobody took.  (Would you?)
  • A group of grown men will watch a 79 year old pop-singer for the full 14 minutes.  Mocking may occur, but the obligatory “Like no one in this room wouldn’t take a run at that” statement will also occur.
  • Splitting the props pool feels good until you remember it covers about half of the cost of your snack purchases. 
  • Anyone but the Patriots.  The Packers may not have won the Super Bowl, but at least it was anyone but the Patriots.




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